修正錯誤的連寫句（Run-on Sentences）範例

今天我們要討論在編修時常看到作者犯的錯誤之一：連寫句（run-on sentence）。

 

問題

 

當句中包含兩個以上的獨立子句卻未正確連接時，即被稱為連寫句。獨立子句是由一組字所組成、可獨立成句的句子，例如：The horse runs。獨立子句連接錯誤可能導致文意不清，使讀者混淆。

 

連寫句有兩種類型：融合句（fused sentence）和逗號拼接句（comma splice）。

 

當獨立子句間沒有標點符號或對等連接詞將其分開時，該句為融合句：

 

My professor read my paper she said it was excellent.

 

當兩個以上的獨立子句僅用逗號隔開時，該句為逗號拼接句：

 

My dog barked angrily, I knew he wanted food.

 

解決方法

 

可使用以下四種方法修改連寫句：

 

1. 使用一個逗號和一個對等連接詞（ and, but, yet, so, or, nor, for ）

 

使用對等連接詞連接兩個獨立子句時，請在對等連接詞前加一個逗號。

 

連寫句（融合句）

My professor read my paper she said it was excellent.

連寫句（逗號拼接句）

My professor read my paper, she said it was excellent.

修正（逗點 + 對等連接詞）

My professor read my paper, and she said it was excellent.

 

2. 使用分號（或者，在某些情況中，也可使用冒號或破折號）

 

可單獨使用分號，或外加一個轉折語，例如：however、at any rate、in contrast、as a result等。轉折語後請記得加上一個逗號，這麼做不會形成逗號拼接句，因為轉折語並非一個獨立子句

 

連寫句（融合句）

My dog barked angrily I knew he wanted food.

連寫句（逗號拼接句）

My dog barked angrily, I knew he wanted food.

修正（分號）

My dog barked angrily; I knew he wanted food.

修正（分號 + 轉折語 + 逗號）

My dog barked angrily; therefore, I knew he wanted food.

 

3. 將獨立子句分開，使其成為完整句

 

若其中一個獨立子句非常長，則建議使用這個方法。

 

連寫句（逗號拼接句）

It seemed to Jane that her son had more than enough pens, they were strewn across the bedroom floor, and some of them were broken, worse still, someone had used the tip of a red pen to mark a smiley face on the wall.

修正（將句子分開） 

It seemed to Jane that her son had more than enough pens. They were strewn across the bedroom floor, and some of them were broken. Worse still, someone had used the tip of a red pen to mark a smiley face on the wall.

 

4. 重組句子，將其中一個子句改為附屬子句

 

若其中一個子句的重要性似乎低於其他子句，便可將該句改為附屬子句。以下為幾個例句，其中被改為附屬子句的子句以底線表示。需注意的是，改寫後的附屬子句不再是獨立子句，無法單獨成為一完整句。

 

連寫句（逗號拼接句）

The largest tree by volume in the world is the General Sherman Sequoia, it is a little over 52,500 cubic feet.

修正（句尾改為附屬子句）

The largest tree by volume in the world is the General Sherman Sequoia, which is a little over 52,500 cubic feet.

連寫句（逗號拼接句）

Richard Chen is a professor at National Taiwan University, he wrote the novel The longest sleep.

修正（句中改為附屬子句）

Richard Chen, a professor at Princeton University, wrote The longest sleep.

連寫句（逗號拼接句）

I told my roommate I would be late, she still locked me out.

修正（句首改為附屬子句）

Although I told my roommate I would be late , she still locked me out.

連寫句（融合句）

I told the children I would read to them they said they wanted to sit by me so they could look at the pictures.

修正（句首改為附屬子句）

When I told the children I would read to them , they said they wanted to sit by me so they could look at the pictures.

 

Reference:

Hacker, Diana. A Writer’s Reference. 5th ed. Boston: Bedford/St. Martin’s, 2003. Print. 200–06.